Longer term, I'm looking at a couple of job possibilities in Edinburgh, Scotland, where I have lots of relatives, and I've already been there and I know I'd like it. Cambridge, England, and Stockholm are also possibilities. After fifteen years chained to MIT's oars and tied to this locale, I am really digging the idea of living someplace very different, for a while at least.
I'm not thinking much about moving within the States, as I've already seen most of the US and I know Boston is where I'd want to be, Stateside. I've already turned down one lucrative job offer, which I thought I was ready to take, but I just couldn't stomach going right back into slave mode so soon. I may decide to take an offer at that place or somewhere else in the Cambridge area, and stay in the area for the long term. But it's all still up in the air, anything can happen at this point.
But it turned out, Christmas was really a pretty nice day, gifts in the morning, campfire at midday with my sister and her husband, watching the solar eclipse. Then a fine Christmas dinner, and I hosted a Scotch tasting for the family, which was good fun -- I've learned enough about Scotch to be able to give a good little tour of the different sorts.
So now I feel much much better, what a wonderful feeling to get out of that dark slump! I think I was really internalizing a lot of my childhood abuse, that still causes me so much trouble. It's really time I got over this old shit, whatever it takes. I am collecting recommendations for therapists and psychiatrists (all suggestions welcome!) and I plan to check in with some of them after the turn of the New Year.
Otherwise, there have been good connections with existing intimates (Lee, after letting the stress of the China trip fade) and new ones too. Kerry, whom I had known a few years ago, reconnected with me at PanThea, and we've been exploring a very interesting and intense scene relationship, and I'm starting another with Dave and Amy, a married couple whom I'd met through the Earth Drum community. No one ever said polyamory was simple or easy, but it's always interesting!
Friday night I went dancing, with a group organized by Roberta. We went to the Fetish Night at Man Ray, which was loads of fun, I hadn't been out clubbing in years. if you're interested in the details of the Fetish Night thing, click here.
Then Saturday night I took Jen out to dinner and to the massage party at Vicka's house. I had been to the first one of these parties, organized by Colleen Campbell, and enjoyed it very much, but missed the second one, and this was the third. When Colleen saw me arrive from across the room, she yelled "Wil's here! Now we can all get naked!" I wasn't expecting such an enthusiastic welcome! She said that the second party (which I missed) was less fun than the first, because people seemed unwilling to take their clothes off. Apparently she and Vicka decided that it was my example that got people stripping down at the first party. It doesn't take much encouragement to get my clothes off, and anyway, with a welcome like that, how could I say no? So I was happy to oblige as a naturist trend setter, and we had lots of good massage that night, and I got to know Colleen better, and reconnect with several old friends.
I did leave rather early, though, because I didn't want to miss Steve & Tom's Chocathon, which is an extraordinary extravaganza of chocolate confections of every kind I've ever heard of, and lots that I haven't! I think Steve takes a whole week off work, just to prepare all these goodies. I tried my best, but I didn't get to taste half of the offerings, and of course there's also lots of good beer and good friends to hang with. I think I came home at 3 in the morning or so.
I spent most of the next weekend visiting with my sister Cindy in Falmouth, and with Lew and Janna in Hyannis (both on Cape Cod), and had a fine time reconnecting with both of them. I helped install a hot tub for Rodger in Fitchburg, then enjoyed hot tub warming parties there, and Wexelblat's in Burlington, and checked in with old friends at both.
Most recently, I made it to the Solstice party and vigil at Rodger's home in Fitchburg. It's really nice to spend the long Yule night with an open fireplace, and a hot tub under the stars, and lots of good food and good friends to hang with. Sunrise was glorious, with a fingernail-thin waning moon over the reddening horizon. Brutally cold though.
Finally I saw Jon Sherred at Rich Folk's new house, and got to see the
new house in the bargain, and I brought us all out to see the Space
Station flyover (it's quite bright, and looks distinctly red), and
tried the fare at Watch City brewpub, with other friends of that gang.
I made it to Walter's bachelor party the next night, my first bachelor
party ever. I wasn't sure what to expect, but knowing Walter, it was
predictable ... an extended music jam in the studio, with porn DVDs
playing on the big screen. Haw! It was fun to jam with those guys again.
The location was not announced until the day of the event, and all I
knew was "within an hour's drive of Boston" so I was thinking of some
abandoned warehouse in Lowell. Turns out, it was in the Dante
cultural center in East Cambridge, just across the street from CBC (my
favorite brewpub), an easy walk from my home! So it turns out I
didn't need to prepare for campout conditions after all.
The space was set up with lots of UV lamps and black-light posters, a
playroom with fluorescent paints and paper for body painting or
do-it-yourself posters, a juice bar, tables full of munchies and
drinks (one was all oranges and grapefruit, another was all sprouts of
various kinds). There was lots of lightshow tech, including colored
strobes, computer controlled lasers, one of those floating oil blob
things projecting on the ceiling, and two huge video projectors.
The video setup was amazing. Besides several movies running (kitsch
like Barbarella, old cartoons, and computer generated oddities), they
had very massive mixing consoles, which allow different images to be
overlaid and combined in various ways. There were also two
interactive video stations, each with a camera pointed at its monitor,
and you can control the feedback by moving the camera around, or
wiggling your fingers in front of it, as well as selecting different
kinds of processing in the video loop. The effects are incredible,
and very varied. The video consoles had access to these images too,
and sometimes mixed them into the main projectors.
The stage was mostly taken up with DJ and sound gear. The music was
mostly techno trancey (I think people call this "Goa" these days, I've
heard this before), and it was LOUD. I put earplugs in before
entering the building, and kept them in the whole time. Most other
people were wearing earplugs too. I guess they like to feel their
lungs resonate. Loud music makes it hard to talk, and earplugs make
it almost impossible, so there wasn't much chance to meet new people.
I did run into Gene (from Earth Drum Council) and Darryl (from the
Purple Palace), though, and it was fun to see familiar faces.
The only real disappointment for me was that the dancing was kind of
minimal by my standards -- not many skilled dancers there, and very
little interaction on the dance floor, which is such fun when it does
happen. On the other hand, I admit to a certain amount of pride in
being able to dance long and hard ... blowing away the kids half my
age in both skill and endurance.
There were also balconies overlooking the main dance floor, and a room
off one balcony was set up as a chill space, with not-as-loud music
and calmer videos, and comfy couches. Colleen set up her massage
table here, and as far as I could tell, she was giving massages most
of the time. Vicka wasn't feeling well, so she was resting here for
some of the time.
I had particular fun watching a guy swinging things which are
essentially little sandbags with day-glo streamers, swung on a string,
one in each hand. The guy was very good, spinning them up and down
and all over the place, and the streamers look great under the UV
lights. He showed me the basics, and I tried them, managed to get
some moves after bonking myself a bunch of times. Several other
people played with them too, but that first guy was clearly the best.
(I found out later they are called
Zuni Poi swings,
and I bought a set at the Discovery Store in Harvard Square.) I
brought out my juggling clubs and tried them, but they don't glow
under black lights, and no one else wanted to try them, apparently.
They closed the doors at 11:00 pm, and I danced until about 1:30 in
the morning. I was totally clean and sober, hadn't ingested anything
that would keep me up late, so I walked home from there. But I'm sure
most folks were there for the whole night, still going strong when I
left.
Happy New Millennium, everyone!Sprout, the rave
Among the many firsts of this year was my first rave! This one was
called Sprout, on Saturday night, 16 December, put on by a loose
disorganization called The Circle. Nice people, mostly, and it was
good fun.Is that all there is?
So anyway, at the turn of the millenium and the end of one of the most
intense, transformational years of my life, I am feeling tired but
happy. I set a lot of goals for this year, and I have achieved most
of them (like the doctorate), and I am within yelling distance of
others (like having my house paid off). Continuing the healing of old
emotional wounds, and planning my next career moves, are going to keep
me busy for the near future, at least, but I say life is pretty good.
Doctor Wil, 12/31/2000